I really need to work on blogging more frequently, so that I don't have a million things to write about; however, today is like most. Warning...lots of thoughts.
First, some of you are probably wondering how the "I Admire You" dinner went a few weeks ago. For those of you that didn't know about it...my home church, North-Mar from Warren, Ohio, decided that they wanted to come down and have a dinner for my kids. The goal was to increase parent communications and to just show the love of Jesus. Parent involvement is a difficult thing in McDowell. Often no matter how well things are planned, the number of parents is low. My little faith had me doubting that parents would come. I kept praying that this would be different. In class, I had my kids write letters to their person that they invited about why they admire them. The letters were amazing and so heart warming. They took these very seriously, and I was so proud of them. I knew that the parents/adults that were invited would be touched if they showed up. Well, Thursday rolled around and I had a wonderful response from the parent forms and the kids themselves...however, I still doubted that they would come that night. About an hour before school let out, the 7 people from North-Mar arrived, and they came to my class. They read the "Candy Cane Story" to the kids which was an awesome way to share about the love of Jesus. Then, the kids who wanted to read their letters aloud did for extra practice. We ended the day with a fun game of "Down by the Banks" (a hand game that is a favorite in our class). The kids were super hyped up, and I knew right away that God was in this and that He was going to blow us all away. Every little detail of the day came together, and by 5:45PM, there were several kids waiting to get in the cafeteria for the dinner that began at 6:30PM. Out of 26 kids, 23 of them plus their special guest of honor showed up. The cafeteria was packed, and everyone was happy to be there. The response from the adults was amazing and so encouraging. As a teacher, I feel like there is sometimes a wall between parents and I. This wall was broken as parents were touched and reached. Many came up to hug me, and there were smiles everywhere. Honestly, I was overwhelmed by how God used North-Mar to bridge this gap. Every prayer was answered in the fullest and overflowing. Thank You, Jesus. After three weeks, I still am so excited about this! Not only did this help with parent communication, but it also showed my kids that there are people in this world that have love and joy. Many comments were made from my kids such as, "Miss Marshall, your friends are all nice. They are such happy people." Even though there was no preaching, I am positive that many kids knew that this love and joy was from the almighty God! He is so good! Thank you North-Mar and thank You, Jesus!!!
As far as my classroom...things are still going fairly well. I am loving teaching still, and God is working so much in my relationships with the staff. This past month has been somewhat difficult for me as I have dealt with selfishness and uncontentment; however, I have also seen my heart finally feel at home with my school. It is a great feeling. The selfishness and uncontentment are still a work in progress. I get discouraged so many days and wonder what I am doing here. I still miss my family like crazy. Most of all, I feel alone here. I know that my Jesus is here at all times! THANK YOU! As a person who loves to be face to face and in close proximity to those I love, this year has just been difficult. I miss hugs from the people I love and having the opportunity to have coffee dates and heart to hearts with friends. Also, God has opened and shut a few doors. They have been difficult at times to deal with, but He has reminded me again that He alone is God. I just need to be still. The other day I was having a huge pity party for myself. I was out of the Word for a few days, and I just was sad at my circumstances and basically....just ridiculous. Then, my mother who always brings me back to God's truth...reminded me of my God. How can I doubt a God who knows my name and who sees every tear I cry? He is the one that has given me my passions in life that I long to serve Him with. So, why would I doubt that He has the best plans for me? It is ridiculous to even think of doubting Him. But I unfortunately do at times. I hate that.
In the midst of my pity party, Jesus brought me to John 15. This is one of my favorite passages. This is the chapter that Jesus tells about the vine and the branch. He tells us that any branch that does not produce fruit is cut off of the vine because it is no good. Just when you feel like you could be that branch and feel hopeless, He says, "every branch that does bear fruit, he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful." (vs. 2). Notice He doesn't say that some branches get pruned...EVERY branch. The key to these fruitful branches is that they "remain" in the vine. There isn't a miracle fruit. It is a process of dedication and discipline. It is painful and uncertain at the moment. But we know the end result. It is something delightful and pure. That is what I want to be to my Jesus. I want to remain in His love that is so deep and overflowing. Then, Jesus tells us that when we remain in Him and produce fruits in our lives, we are in touch with Him. At this point, we may ask the Father for whatever we want. He longs to give us the desires of our hearts. If my desire is to serve Him with all of my heart, don't you think that He is capable of giving me the things I need to serve Him? Of course! Vs. 8 is awesome, "This is to my Father's glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to by my disciples." Wow. He doesn't want bruised fruit that is only looking for a free pass to heaven. He wants beautiful fruit that makes His glory shine through our lives as disciples on daily basis. In verse 11 He tells us that this is the secret to our joy...that we must remain in His love. It is easy to see why I was on my pity party once reading this.
The passage's ending is the best part...."I have no longer called you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you FRIENDS, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit- fruit that will last." (vs. 15-16) Our God has called us to be pruned through life's challenges and painful circumstances that come and go. He has done this so that we can experience His love that overflows into our lives, producing indescribable joy as our best friend. This joy and love has no other choice but to spread to others so they can be called FRIEND. We have all we need because we have been given the Word of God.
As I reflect on this, I am amazed at the love of God for me. I have felt his pruning in my life and yeah...it hurts. I sometimes get lost in the pain and the current feeling. However, my God has such greater plans for me than that moment. He will keep pruning me till I am perfect in His eyes...till I can be fully used for His glory. And best of all, even during the pruning and the selfishness and pain, He still calls me friend.
Yeah, I was right when I said that this would be a long update. I hope that my ramblings are clear and maybe encouraging to you today. If you feel like your life doesn't make sense and that things are just plain hard right now...you have a friend that is making you be the most beautiful person that you can be. Remain in His love today and forever.
Please pray for me that I would continue to be pruned to be the woman that my Jesus wants me to be. Also, please pray for me to remember to be still before my God as He makes His will for me clear. There are a lot of things on my heart with next year, and I just need His clarity. I don't want to live a life that is for me. I may think that I do at times and even start to act like it. But in the depths of my heart, I know that I want my life to be His and for His glory.
